Our brains are very interesting. There's a thing called "cognitive dissonance", which is the gross discomfort of holding two conflicting ideas in your head at once.
For example, I used to believe work is something you have to get through, that adults just grit their teeth and find a way to pay the bills. When I met anyone who was lit up from doing purposeful, profitable work, it scrambled my brain and heart. I thought that something fishy was going on, because this person lived so differently from my bummed out belief. So I did what a lot of people do: Packed my social life as best I could, and hung out around others who were just mreh about their jobs.
Maybe you can relate.
It can be really hard to see passionate people making their own cool brand of ruckus in the world.
It's easy to hide out by saying "That's them. I can't have that." You feel the painful difference between their world and your own. So, maybe you brush the feelings under the rug and distract yourself, because...
You know you can do better than this.
After you replace that tired out belief, you'll want to only surround yourself with people who radiate love and fulfillment in their careers, instead of avoiding them. Because what they think is possible will match what you believe is possible for yourself.